


Love, Hate, And Everything Between

by revenblue



Series: [collection] but you keep spinning 'round me just the same [6]
Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Ficlet Collection, M/M, some aren't ambiguous but it can go either way really
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-27
Updated: 2018-07-13
Packaged: 2019-02-07 08:43:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 3,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12837519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revenblue/pseuds/revenblue
Summary: "Nemesis" doesn't describe just how much they mean to each other, and yet it's become everything.A collection of Perryshmirtz ficlets.





	1. Blanket

**Author's Note:**

> So I have a bunch of Perryshmirtz ficlets that I can't be bothered titling etc, but I wanna shove them up here anyway.
> 
> Some will be (romantic) shippy, some will be more bromance-y, hence the two relationship tags. I ship them in every quadrant at once so the lines get pretty blurred at times. XD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> > Heinz _definitely_ steals the covers from Perry when they sleep together.  
>  ~~Additionally, Perry ends up snuggling up to him to keep warm.~~  
> 
> 
> [[Original post](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/post/158106927924/perryshmirtz-heinz-definitely-steals-the-covers)] 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting off with a spontaneous ficlet from a few months ago.
> 
> Ambiguous relationship I guess, but intended as romantic Perry/Heinz.

Perry was cold. Again.

He shivered, rolled over, and pulled the blanket back. This was the third time in as many minutes that Heinz had stolen it.

It wouldn’t be so bad, he thought, if Heinz didn’t also keep the rest of the room only barely above freezing. And it wasn’t even winter yet.

Beside him, Heinz mumbled something in his sleep and rolled over, stealing the blanket _again_. He’d known the man was Evil, but this was something else.

Just because he had fur, that didn’t mean he didn’t also want a blanket.

But if he couldn’t have a blanket…

He gently tugged the stuffed toy out of Heinz’s arms and slid into the gap. Much better. Warm and cosy and most importantly _not cold_. And, if he listened closely, he could even hear Heinz’s heartbeat.

The best part was, he thought as he drifted off to sleep, that this was one blanket Heinz couldn’t steal.


	2. Clothes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [3: Who walks around the house half-naked and who yells at them to put on some clothes?](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/post/166172093559/for-the-otp-questions-number-3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a blatantly romance-y Perry/Heinz one~

"You know, sometimes I forget you're not wearing _pants_ ," Heinz said, frowning at his nemesis.

Perry the Platypus, suave semiaquatic personification of unstoppable dynamic fury, top agent at the O.W.C.A., shrugged sheepishly. It wasn't _his_ fault he couldn't find anything that fit his tail. Besides, it wasn't like anyone cared, he was a platypus and everyone knew platypuses didn't wear pants.

Especially Carl. Carl knew Perry didn't wear pants. That's why Carl had stopped providing them with his fancy black tie suits.

Heinz wasn't finished. "I suppose it must be hard with your _tail_ and all... How about I make you some?"

It was a generous offer, from the man who mere hours ago had tried to destroy all the socks in the Tri-State Area because one had a hole in it. Regardless, Perry shook his head.

"I'll even leave off the self-destruct button?"

Perry made a show of considering this, then shook his head again. No pants.

Heinz sank down to his knees, clasping his hands out in front of him. "Come on, even just underwear? You looked _so good_ in those the other week."

Was _that_ what this was about? Perry raised an eyebrow, folding his arms. If Heinz wanted him to _dress up_ for the evening, he was going to need to come out and _say_ so. None of this pussyfooting around.

"Come on, Perry the Platypus," Heinz whined. "You could really _pull off_ the skinny jeans look. And then I could _pull_ them _off_ you, what do you say?"

Perry sighed internally. Blatant innuendos, his one weakness. He couldn't say no to _that_.

...Especially with Heinz making that face. His other one weakness.

Looked like he was going to end up in pants after all. But not for long, if Heinz made good on his promise. Either way, it was going to be an interesting night.


	3. NotLP Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally an outline for a fic that never came to pass, but it's vaguely poetic so I [posted it on my sideblog](https://cutewhitebunny.tumblr.com/post/155293926039/alright) and peeps liked it, so... yeah.
> 
> And I mean, we never did see what happened to Perry after everyone was changed back.
> 
> Totally intended as romantic Perry/Heinz but it's pretty ambiguous.

Heinz and Vanessa are going off to play a board game (Kleptocracy)  
Perry’s just changed back and is… not feeling too great  
shaking and such  
“Perry the Platypus! A-are you okay?”  
and then

clinging  
Heinz clinging to Perry because he’s worried, part of him remembers almost losing Perry  
Perry not wanting to lose /his/ rock

but, uh. the clinging didn’t start immediately  
because Perry punched Heinz in the face  
being all “you fucking idiot, how could you”  
(and also lashing out, from being in pain, because he’s not doing too well)

and Heinz is really apologetic  
probably trying to feign ignorance of what happened so as not to freak out Vanessa  
but he’s really sorry for what happened to Perry  
and won’t let him go without making sure he’s alright  
because it’s his fault  
and he’s  
so  
sorry

and Perry  
he can’t go back to his family like this  
not when he’s shaking and terrified and hurting  
so he seeks refuge (eventually) in the arms of his best friend slash nemesis  
who caused the whole clusterfuck but who also rescued him in the helicopter  
it’s a confusing mix of feelings  
but Heinz is  
there  
and holding him

he feels like he’s drowning, he doesn’t know which way is up  
and Heinz is the only solid presence he can find  
he clings to Heinz like a someone in an ocean clings to a lifesaver

he holds onto Heinz, pressing himself closer  
until the only thing he’s aware of is the sound of Heinz’s heartbeat, the feel of his chest moving  
Heinz is his whole world, right then  
and he stays like that until he can breathe again  
until he can get his shaking under control  
until the world stops spinning around him

and Heinz is still sorry  
he’s holding Perry close  
stroking his fur  
mumbling to himself  
hating himself for everything

for hurting Vanessa  
(he’s so glad Vanessa doesn’t remember)  
for hurting Perry  
(he doesn’t know how to fix this, he just knows that he needs to know Perry’s alright)

he wonders if Perry will want anything to do with him, after  
(of course he will, they both need each other too much)  
he’d understand if he didn’t  
he wouldn’t want to know himself either  
(oh, Heinz)

and Vanessa  
she doesn’t know how to help  
she doesn’t want to intrude  
she brought out a blanket though  
wrapped it around them  
Heinz still hasn’t moved from where he crouched down to pick Perry up

Vanessa doesn’t know what to do  
she makes tea though  
(it’s barely drinkable. they don’t care.)  
she digs out Kleptocracy

everything’s so fragile  
like it could all shatter

Vanessa gets them moving  
sets up the game

Heinz is still holding Perry tight  
so tight  
like he’s the only thing keeping Perry together  
(he’s right)

and Perry  
opens his eyes  
finally  
and he feels safe now  
he’s safe

he looks into Heinz’s eyes  
they’re both crying  
neither of them noticed until now

Heinz smiles  
gently  
brokenly

Perry smiles back  
just as gently  
just as broken  
but just as hopeful

and then Heinz turns back to Vanessa  
thanks her for the tea, for being there  
(she doesn’t seem to remember changing)  
(he can’t bear to remind her)  
(he’s so sorry)

so they play Kleptocracy for the next few hours  
the three of them  
and Norm

and everything will be  
alright

they’ll be alright


	4. Winter Traditions (drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From r/Fanfiction's [Pint-sized Prompts](https://www.reddit.com/r/FanFiction/comments/7guuz3/pintsized_prompts_december_2017/), December 1 2017:
>
>> It's winter! Your characters venture outside to enjoy the freshly fallen snow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ambiguous relationship here.  
> (The best thing about this ficlet compilation is that I never have to pick which relationship tag to use.)
> 
> 100-word drabble, incidentally.

The first snowfall was always the best, Perry knew. Not just because the boys took it as an opportunity to dig out the winter gloves and hats and blueprints, but also because this year his nemesis had promised to build a snowman with him.

He could only hope it wasn't the same meaning of "build" that the boys used. _One_ giant walking snowman was enough for the day, thank you very much. Still, he was excited.

But when Heinz finally shuffled out, bundled in three different misshapen sweaters, Perry decided sitting in front of the fire was just as good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't exactly fit the prompt, but... who doesn't love some wintertime snuggling? :D
> 
> (Perry totally ended up with Heinz's cold the next day though :P)


	5. Smorch (drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From r/Fanfiction's [Pint-sized Prompts](https://www.reddit.com/r/FanFiction/comments/7guuz3/pintsized_prompts_december_2017/), December 14 2017:
>
>> A sprig of mistletoe. Two characters. Dialogue ONLY.
> 
> It's not an OWCA Christmas party without an awkward encounter under the mistletoe. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another 100-word drabble.  
> Romantic Perry/Heinz.
> 
> I swear, it took me far longer to agonise over a title (and fail!) than to write the thing in the first place. So, screw it, here's "smorch", a dialogue-only drabble.

Ah, Perry the Platypus... You're trapped! Under the mistletoe! And you know what _that_ means, don't you?

Don't look at me like that, it's not _my_ fault you waited here for me.

You did! You could have moved out of the way but you didn't, it's like you _wanted_ to be trapped.

Ugh, there you go rolling your eyes again. I'm right and you know it. Now pucker up. 

Why do you always have to make this so _difficult_? Now people are _staring_. And by "staring" I mean- Wait, what are you-

...Where did you learn to kiss like _that_?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...I've left basically _everything_ implied, whoops.


	6. things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Perryshmirtz, things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/post/168624646374/perryshmirtz-things-you-said-that-i-wasnt-meant)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Romantic Perry/Heinz.
> 
> Experimenting with third omni for emotional stuff, because I tend to run myself into a niche with the second person pov. ~~Or at least I hope it's third omni.~~

Night had fallen while the nemeses had fought for control over the remote, casting its shadow over the balcony. The moon was barely a sliver of light, and mostly hidden behind the clouds, and they were both exhausted.

That was probably why he said it.

Struggling over the remote, mouth running on autopilot, tired enough for his filter to fail. "You're so _annoying_ , Perry the Platypus, I don't know why I love you. Now give it!"

At this, Perry stopped, giving Heinz the opportunity to snatch the remote out of his paws. A success, albeit a slight one. And yet, he didn't push the button. Not immediately.

"As soon as I push _this button_ , all the loose change in the Tri-State Area will come to me!" Heinz gloated, so Perry would have ample time to stop him.

Except, he didn't.

The still night air wrapped around the both of them, like a new quilt that hadn't learned the shape of their bodies yet, cold and unfamiliar. For a moment, nothing moved.

Heinz lowered his hands, finally noticing the expression on his nemesis's face. "Was it something I said? Because whatever it was, you know I don't _mean_ it. I never know what I'm going to say before I say it, you should know that by now!"

This was the wrong thing to say, if Perry's reaction was anything to go by. The platypus's mouth twisted, tears welling up in his eyes that he had to blink away, and he pointed at Heinz's chest.

The meaning was clear. _Why_.

The answer was less so. Why _had_ Heinz said it? He didn't know. Deep down, he was scared to find out.

Not that he had much choice, if he wanted to salvage anything. And he only had one shot. One opportunity. One _nemesis_ , and wasn't that why he did any of this?

Taking a deep breath, he began to speak.

It didn't come out all at once. Heinz, not used to unplanned emotional outpourings, stopped and started and backtracked, until finally...

"I love you," he admitted, closing his eyes in fear of what he would see. "There, I said it. Happy now?"

His fears were unfounded.

Perry, far from reacting with disgust - or worse, _leaving_ \- nodded like his suspicions were confirmed. He'd thought the idea was odd, at first, but over the last few months it had become clear just how much Heinz cared for him.

And now... it was all out in the open, impossible to deny.

What was he supposed to do? What were either of them supposed to do? Keep fighting and pretend everything was normal? Or, and this was the terrifying option, talk about it?

But really, there was only one thing Perry _could_ do. He stepped forward, tugged the remote out of Heinz's hand, and replaced it with his paw.

The clouds parted, moonlight hitting them just as Heinz opened his eyes.

"This doesn't have to change anything, you know," he said, squeezing Perry's paw tighter anyway.

Perry shrugged. He knew. And yet, if it did, would that really be so bad?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written in two sections, because I couldn't think through how to finish the first part and went with an open ending, then came back after sleeping to close it. ~~Hopefully that's not obvious haha.~~
> 
> Side note, I had a song stuck in my head while writing this because of who I am as a person. Specifically, these lines:
>
>> and I don't even know what kind of things I said  
> my mouth kept moving and my mind went dead
> 
> from [Waiting For The End](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qF_qbaWt3Q) by Linkin Park.  
> Not quite title material but, you know, it's a thing. 


	7. Drown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Platonic Perry&Heinz.
> 
> Written solely to justify the & relationship tag on this collection.

Things never go according to plan. You know that. But it never stops the sudden shock of gut-clenching _fear_ every time something goes terribly, catastrophically wrong.

He's in the water. He'd tripped over his inator and fallen off the skiff and you _know_ he can't swim, you _know_ there's no one else around to save him but even if there were it still wouldn't matter because you're already diving in after him.

The ocean's cold, and you'd be thankful for your watertight fur if you weren't painfully aware of how much water his clothing can hold, how heavy it must be right now.

You can't hear him yelling for help now, over the sound of the waves and your own heartbeat, and that terrifies you. If he's under the water, if he's _drowning_... You close your eyes and _dive_ , pressing your hat to your head.

Thankfully, once you're underwater you can feel the disturbance from his frantic kicking in your bill, and you move towards it. You're not too late.

Just as you reach him, he goes under, the ocean pulling him down. You can't let that happen. You can't let him slip away from you, not _now_. So you swim up behind him, wrapping your arms around his narrow chest.

He panics, air slipping out of him as he lets out a silent scream, but you hold him tight and kick for the surface. It's hard, he fights you every step of the way, but someone has to save him and that someone is you. Saving him is what you _do_.

At last, _at last_ , you reach the surface. He's still struggling against you but that's _fine_ , he's alive and that's what matters. A few kicks to the ribs and he's coughing up water, finally calming down as he breathes actual air.

Alive. 

The sky's still clear but the jet skiff is gone, and you activate the emergency beacon on your watch. When you get back you'll have to send OWCA's R&D a gift basket for the one-handed activation feature, but for now all you can do is wait for rescue, kicking your feet so you can keep his head above water.

He's leaning against you now like he's too exhausted to do more than _breathe_. You're thankful he can do even that much. If he was gone... You have no idea what you'd do with yourself.

But he's _not_ gone, he's here with you, he'll live to scheme another day. Maybe not tomorrow, but someday soon. And you'll be there to thwart him.

For that, you'd save him again and again.


	8. Bad Santa (drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From r/Fanfiction's [Pint-sized Prompts](https://www.reddit.com/r/FanFiction/comments/7guuz3/pintsized_prompts_december_2017/), December 20 2017:
>
>> Straight from your character's worst nightmares: evil Santa is on the loose!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Platonic Perry&Heinz.
> 
> Yet another 100-word drabble. (I keep writing them for some reason XD)

Perry stared.

"Do you like it?" Doctor D said, doing a little twirl. "I'm Santa!" And indeed he was, dressed from head to toe in red and white. "And why, you ask?"

The answer was obvious. Evil.

But of course, Doctor D couldn't leave his rhetorical question unanswered. "Do you know those mall Santas? Ugh, I hate them so much. They're all so _jolly_. What are they hiding? So I'm going to find out, and then I will harness its power for _evil_ -"

That's when Perry tackled him to the floor. Thwarting evil, one bad Santa scheme at a time.


	9. Smile

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From r/fanfiction's [Pint-Size Prompts](https://www.reddit.com/r/FanFiction/comments/68kmla/pintsized_prompts_may_2017/), May 17th 2017:
>
>> Even when you get it wrong, I smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Started this in May, realised I'd lost Heinz's voice so put it on the backburner, dug it up Today™ (Christmas Eve) to finish it. Whoops.  
> But hey, better late than never.
> 
> Platonic Perry&Heinz.

It was a quiet day, or at least as quiet as it ever got at Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated. Which meant it wasn't quiet at all, with the sounds of mechanical engineering coming from the top floor.

Inside the large laboratory, one Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz was leaning over a small round object, soldering some wires in place with a modified blowtorch. His robot ~~son~~ assistant, Norm, hung streamers across the ceiling.

After a few minutes, Heinz set down the blowtorch. "I hope Perry the Platypus likes this," he said, poking at the insides of the machine with a long finger. Norm didn't answer. He didn't need to. They both knew what he would say, and it was... less than positive. But Heinz, eternal optimist that he is, continued on anyway, screwing a panel on over the wiring. "He probably will, he liked that vase I got him-"

That was when a small device on the wall nearby chose to beep.

Heinz sat up straight. "He's here! Norm, how's the cake going?"

Norm extended an arm into the kitchen, retrieving a thoroughly-decorated teal cake. "All done, sir!"

Alas, Heinz wasn't looking, to Norm's eternal disappointment. He'd picked up the round object and moved to answer the door, avoiding the scattered traps with the ease of long practice. He opened the door right as his nemesis raised a foot to kick it down.

"Happy birthday, Perry the Platypus!" Heinz said brightly, presenting the object.

It was not, in fact, Perry the Platypus's birthday. Not even close.

Perry took the object, turning it over in his tiny paws, carefully avoiding the obvious self-destruct button. It was about the size of his head and shaped like a human skull, although obviously mechanical in nature. He, unsurprisingly, had less use for a skull-shaped inator than he did for a vase, as he happened to be an actual teal platypus. And a housepet.

Finding appropriate gifts had never been one of Heinz's strengths. In fairness, this was mostly from lack of experience.

Heinz shoved his hands in his pockets in a completely unsubtle attempt to feign casualness that fooled absolutely no one, least of all Perry the Platypus. "So? What do you think?"

During his investigation, Perry's finger brushed over a small button, unbeknownst to him, and music blared out of a hidden speaker. To his credit, he didn't jump... much. Plus his well-honed secret agent reflexes let him hold onto it rather than it falling to the ground.

When he'd recovered from the shock, Perry realised he recognised the song. And the voice singing it.

"He's a semi-aquatic, egg-laying mammal of action," Heinz's voice crooned from the skull.

It was, alas, not the first time Perry had been faced with the idea that his nemesis knew the words to his theme song.

Heinz laughed nervously, rubbing at the back of his neck. "I thought it would be, you know, nice? Hold on, let me pause that for you-" He leaned down and tapped a seemingly arbitrary point on the side of the skull, shutting off the song. "-where was I? I heard it was your _birthday_ , the O.W.C.A. puts out a _newsletter_ and it was on there and I just _happened_ to sign up to it the first time I quit Evil, remember that, Perry the Platypus?"

Perry did, in fact, remember. More than that, he also remembered the time the O.W.C.A. had tried to celebrate his birthday on the wrong day entirely, which coincidentally was exactly one year earlier.

Rather than saying any of this, he rolled his eyes in exasperation.

"Don't look at me like that, Perry the Platypus, at least I tried! Come on in, I've got cake," Heinz said, shooing Perry inside. "You like cake, right? Of course you do. I don't have a _scheme_ today, or, well, I do but it's your birthday party- I'm completely off on the date, aren't I?"

Perry shrugged, allowing himself a small smile. It wouldn't be Heinz without the misdirected enthusiasm.

"But hey, you get a present and some cake, that's gotta count for something, right?"

It counted for a lot, actually. Perry had never been able to participate in his own birthday parties properly before, so he couldn't help but appreciate the effort Heinz had gone to. Even if he couldn't quite trust the results. Mostly out of habit, now.

Heinz, of course, completely lived up to that mistrust by trapping him as soon as he walked in the door.

Even so, neither of them would change a thing, if given the choice.


	10. Fear (double drabble)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two spontaneous drabbles on the concept of "greatest fear". (Well, the first on was spontaneous. The second one fought me.)  
> Spoilers for Cheers For Fears.
> 
> Ambiguous relationship.
> 
> Also second person pov, because I have no self-control. With a pov switch because... yolo?

Despite your claims, your greatest fear isn't anything as trivial as vending machines taking over. Nothing that simple or easily-packaged.

Your inator... well, you'd _called_ it the Worst Fear-inator, but really it called upon irrational phobias. After all, you don't want to _hurt_ your nemesis. Well. You _do_ , but in a slapstick kind of way, not probing into his _secrets_.

Whatever Perry the Platypus is scared of... It has to be bad. That, and your greatest fear is him _leaving_.

The aching loneliness of a scheme well-thwarted is bad enough- That's when a cute teal paw rests on your hand.

* * *

Despite what it says on your new business cards, you're not wholly fearless. The things that terrify you are few and far between, but they exist. You've had to face them more often than you're comfortable with already.

So when he'd fired his Worst Fear-inator, you'd been prepared for something much worse than... Nothing.

Or the vending machines. He'd screamed, you'd had to save him, but you know your nemesis. You know his greatest fear.

That's why you're here. Heinz sits slumped in an armchair, staring into the distance, hand within easy reach. What can you do, but reach out?


	11. Thursday (double drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for the lovely Owlish's [prompt on r/fanfiction](https://www.reddit.com/r/FanFiction/comments/8g689p/mays_magical_minifics_daily_prompts_for_may_2018/):
>
>> May 3: Thursdays. I never could get the hang of Thursdays. For your characters, this Thursday is exceptionally strange because they have woken up with powers/abilities they didn’t have--or didn't know they had--before. (200 Words)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mild UST Perry/Heinz, apparently.

"Fuck mornings," you mutter as your watch vibrates an alert, then freeze. Since when could you _talk_? Out loud, like a human.

Except you don't have time to muse on it because your watch vibrates again, insistently.

After glancing around to make sure the boys didn't hear you, because you are _not_ going to be responsible for them learning new words, you slip down to your base through the bookshelf entrance.

Habit keeps you silent during your briefing, but your mission's another matter entirely.

"For fuck's sake," you growl, having walked into _yet another_ rope trap. Does he have a kink for this or something?

With a scandalised gasp, he spins around to face you. " _Language_ , Perry the Platypus!" 

Seriously? You stare at him, stone-faced. Just because you _can_ speak now doesn't mean you _need_ to, especially when a well-placed glare works just as well.

He breaks the stare first, ceding you the victory. "I bet you're wondering why you can suddenly _talk_ -"

"Nope," you say, shrugging off the ropes. Then you fight him.

It's not long before he lies on the floor, defeated. "Curse you, Perry the Platypus," he groans.

You touch your hat in a salute. "Anytime, Heinz."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Perry is a pottymouth and no one can ever convince me otherwise.
> 
> I may or may not write another version without the wordcount limit someday. Had a plot bunny tempt me in an interesting direction.


	12. flower (drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from [r/fanfiction](https://www.reddit.com/r/FanFiction/comments/8g689p/mays_magical_minifics_daily_prompts_for_may_2018/):
>
>> May 13: A flower has special properties and it is just what your character has been looking for. (100 Words)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Romantic Perry/Heinz. In second person pov as always.

At long last, after weeks of searching, your quest is over. You've found it! The rare _Callistemon lanceolatus_ (except, as it turns out, it's now called _Melaleuca citrina_ instead. You'd run into a few dead ends before figuring _that_ one out), with many supposed properties, although you're only interested in one.

Either way, you've found one. And for a good price, too!

One trip back to Danville later... 

"Happy Valentine's Day, Perry the Platypus," you say, kissing him on the cheek. "I brought you some flowers~"

The smile they bring to his face is exactly the property you were after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a bottlebrush bc I wanted to be self-indulgent. When I was a kid, there was a bottlebrush plant by the mailbox, and I guess it made an impression?
> 
> Also, this is here and not separate bc titles are hard.


	13. boop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [“I got you Perry the Platypus…boop!“](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/post/174083168664/pxdoodles-i-got-you-perry-the-platypusboop)  
>  (based on art by pxdoodles)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there was a new artist posting in the Perryshmirtz tag on tumblr... I had to welcome them with a ficlet :P  
> Romantic Perry/Heinz, with a very tsundere Perry apparently. Also in third limited because I like pain.

Perry sighed. He should have known. Only Heinz could decide that booping him somehow counted as Evil. Ridiculous ~~ly adorable~~.

Speaking of, the man showed no sign of stopping. "Isn't this so _Evil_?" Heinz teased, booping Perry on the nose again.

And, no matter what any evil scientists may claim afterwards, Perry did _not_ squeak. It wasn't in his nature as a professional - or, in fact, at all. No, he was a stone cold agent.

Completely uncaring of this, Heinz tugged on the rope trap, pulling Perry close enough to place a light kiss on the tip of his bill. Right where his fingertip had been only a few moments earlier.

Perry _definitely_ didn't squeak at that. Or grab onto Heinz's shirt to pull him into a proper kiss.

Pulling Heinz out through the window, though, he'd acknowledge _that_ any day. After all, what else was a nemesis for?


	14. Kiss On The Cheek (double drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Kiss, kiss, kiss <3](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/post/175197123819/mushipper713-kiss-kiss-kiss-3-heinz-and).  
> [Perry wants a kiss <3](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/post/175197373519/mushipper713-perry-wants-a-kiss-3-sequel)  
>  (based on art by mushipper713)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Romantic Perry/Heinz.
> 
> Originally two drabbles, split after "curse you Perry the Platypus", for two probably-unrelated bits of shippy art from mushipper713. Hashtag no ragrets.

The sight of Perry the Platypus jumping at him was a familiar sight for one Heinz Doofenshmirtz. He'd fought the platypus many times since they'd become nemeses, which felt a lifetime ago. Lost every time, of course.

It was worth it, to spend time with the one person who was always there for him.

Today, Perry the Platypus wasn't looking for a fight. His paws were outstretched rather than curled in a fist, and how could Heinz refuse _that_?

He spun around as he caught his nemesis, blushing when Perry the Platypus kissed his cheek.

"Curse you, Perry the Platypus."

Fingers twisted tight in Heinz's lab coat, Perry the Platypus chirred, leaning back to stare into Heinz's eyes with a self-satisfied smirk. The message was clear: this was a competition, and one Perry was _not_ going to lose.

Neither of them would have it any other way.

Perry the Platypus was the first to move, pressing his mouth against the man's in a soft kiss, saying more in the simple gesture than any words could.

Taken by surprise, it was all Heinz could do to respond, hands coming up to hold the platypus close.

They were both winners this day.


	15. Flustered (drabble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Before and after the Smooch](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/post/175818427109)  
>  (based on art by spideryspade)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very much romantic Perry/Heinz. :P

You'll never get tired of how _comfortable_ he looks, nestled in your arms. Your adorable nemesis.

He yawns, churring adorably as he snuggles just that little bit closer, not taking his eyes off the movie you're both watching. Well, _he's_ watching. _You're_ too _distracted_ , running your fingers through his soft fur.

On a whim, you press your lips to the tip of his kissable bill.

A squeak and he shoves at you with his little paw. But he can't fool you, not with that shy smile of his. He _likes_ it.

You grin. "Aw, Perry the Platypus, are you _embarrassed_?"

**Author's Note:**

> Usual link to the [Discord server](https://discord.gg/eEhRMq3) in case anyone wants to join.
> 
> Feel free to send me prompts here or on [tumblr](http://revenblue.tumblr.com/) too. I can't promise I'll get around to them but they can be pretty fun.


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